FR#31: Neko Part 1 OR Thou art God. I am a Cat - A Christmas Story

Date: Around Christmas; Dec 30th 2009
Location: Virtual Reality
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Call me crazy, but I want to learn Japanese. On Craigslist, I found an exchange partner. Let's call her Neko.
Neko has poor English. My Japanese is nonexistent. After a short correspondence through e-mail, she began calling me. With my limited Japanese, I flirted with her and played with her - she is the playful type. Our first conversation ended with: "Thou art God. I am a cat. Good bye."

Meanwhile, I searched for a new Chinese exchange partner. I role played with her heavily, and I had thought she had gotten freaked out and gave up. It turns out something crazy happened at her work and we're still good. I will attach some of the e-mails later.

Lesson:
-Don't go too nuts with role playing through e-mail. It is not immediate enough.


The first day I return to NYC, Neko wants to meet up, so we do. Upon meeting, I hug her and kiss her on the cheek. She says she's cold, so I turn her toward me and pull my scarf around her neck.
Neko does not know the area, neither do I. We walk anyway. As we chat, I often touch her elbow or her upper back. I spot a cafe, grab her by the elbow, and pull her in.
I banter with the register, which she seems to think is fun. I notice her hands have brown stains on them and as I take her hands in mine, I ask her if these are blood stains (of course they are not). She is a hairdresser and has been dying people's hair all day. I tug on her hair gently and ask her if her hair color is real. Most everything I have to repeat carefully, and I often use Chinese characters to clarify my meaning.

We sit down with our drinks. I whip out my pen and pad to use for explanations. This forces us to sit close, side-by-side, and requires a lot of hand kino as we switch off the pen. I get carried away with her and forget to drink my latte.
The cafe closes and we start walking toward the subway. I tell her that I am hungry and that we are going to eat. I bounce her to the falafel place near my home (which regrettably has since closed) and we eat and talk.
It gets late and she has to go back home. I take her to the subway. On the way, we somehow role play dying and being resuscitated with a defibrillator. Boob kino. ;-)


Lessons:
-Kino immediately always. Escalate the kino as soon as possible as well with hand touching, hair touching, etc.
-Lead. Whether you are pushing her along as you walk or pulling her into a cafe - always lead.
-Banter with anyone while in her presence to create social proof. You are a friendly, outgoing, and socially generous person.
-Never be so absorbed with a woman that you forget your surroundings or what is important to you. For example, don't forget to drink that green tea soy latte you just bought.
-If you bounce to a restaurant near your place, but are afraid it is getting late, take the food to go and eat it in your apartment.
-When a girl pretends to die, always use a (pretend) defibrillator.